Thursday, August 21, 2008

The Fellowship of the Furdleys

The Fellowship of the Furdleys

Henrietta also knew that they would spend a week in this forsaken
swamp batting flies, mosquitoes, bats, boars, and huge insects of the
scary kind. These bugs were all unbelievably ugly things with noisy
legs and wings that had a tendency to get stuck in your hair unless
you pulled it all out - an idea that she was beginning to grow fond of.


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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The night was crawli

The night was crawling and singing with the sounds of summer. It made
Henrietta's skin crawl just like the little creepy creatures that were
making all the noise. Her mind was also crawling with a dozen
questions. Why were they out here in the woods without a tent? Where
was the trusty and safe, good old VanZam? What were all these creepy
bugs and toads up to? Where were they? How long could she last before
she went totally bonkers and ran through the woods shrieking like a
compete lunatic, fell into the swamp, gargled mud, swallowed a toad,
and puked up her pbjs? She knew the answer to all of these questions
and more. She was in a swamp in the median strip on Interstate 95 in
South Carolina. The Furdleys were involved in another one one their
fear Daddy's fantasies come true, Mr. Furdley had been fascinated all
winter with the cable TV show Survivor Guy. You know the show. This
guy Less Trout spends a week all alone and films himself trying to
survive in places that the average person would never get within a
hundred miles of. He improvises shelter and hunts for wild food. He
makes fishing hooks out of junk he finds in the wilderness but he
never catches a fish so that's why they call him Less Trout. Actually,
Nodamn Trout would be more a far more accurate name.
The VanZam was back home in their driveway protecting it from the
strong rays of the sun and the evening thunder storms. Daddy had
rented a mini SUV by Toymaka from Ripcord Motors; it was a one way
contract so a local pickup service had taken it away last night when
they arrived and unloaded their gear, if you call a multi- tool and
some odd pieces of junk gear.
She was whining inside about beloved Daddy.

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